We have all been close all of our lives. Even Julia and I with 8 years age difference.
On October 1, 2012 our lives changed forever and not in a good way.
Julia’s story- Julia was born September 14, 1989. Out of all 3 of us she was the athletic one and acted almost like a little boy until she was about 7 years old- it was right around that time that my dad moved out and my parents got a divorce.
She had lots of friends, played softball, and did gymnastics all of which she was pretty good at. Julia also was a cheerleader growing up, but probably only because her two older sisters did as well; she was just following in our paths.
She started having friends that were very questionable, yet always seemed to stay above what they were doing and felt that their choices for “fun” weren’t things she wanted to do.
Her senior year she found out she had some heart issues. It was a murmur type of problem and doctors weren’t sure why she was dealing with this. This same year she then started dating one of the questionable friends. Her whole life began to be his life. She pushed further and further away from us (her sisters) but we still tried to maintain a relationship with her. Her prom weekend (May 2008) she made choices that would change her forever.
Some of her friends were popping pills and drinking. Some of them were already at the point of snorting pills. These pills being prescription pain relievers (Vicodin, Percocet, or Oxycodone). For some reason, she decided she would try it out. She became addicted. It can happen that fast, after just one weekend of trying it out.
After this weekend she then began using on a regular basis. When just taking the pills wasn’t enough, she began snorting them. At this point it becomes a very expensive habit, and when it doesn’t get you high like it used to, Heroin becomes the next best high.
She tried many times to get clean, as she continued to date her high school boyfriend who also used. Realizing she wanted to get “clean” she broke up with him knowing that he was just as much her drug as the actual drug was. She then started to seem as if she was doing OK. I will say OK because we truthfully never knew what was actually going on in her head. She met a new boyfriend who was awesome. They moved in together and he basically took care of her like a husband would a wife. At some point she started using again.
She then wanted to get clean and went to a Florida rehab facility. Julia was over 6 months clean while she did their program and lived in a sober house down there. Her boyfriend continued to be supportive of her. She then moved back home and was doing very well- Looking for work and so on. Then one of her drug friends continued to text her with the term “YOU FLY I BUY,” this meaning: If you come and take me to get some drugs I will buy them for us to use. Now she didn’t just have one text. This friend was harassing her to the point that she just gave in. On the morning of Monday, October 1, 2012 she went and picked this friend up, went back to her house, and it was there that she them over dosed on heroin. This is where it gets fuzzy because I know this friend then contacted her boyfriend said that Julia locked herself in her house (which we found to be a seem fishy) and something was wrong. Her boyfriend went to this house, broke down the door and found her already cold.
There is many speculations on what could have been done. The friend disappeared for some time. I still don’t know who this person is, just their name.
After all of us got the call we realized she was gone forever.
Back to My story-
Losing a sister has been extremely hard for me but I guess you can say I am strong. Thinking my sister will never be the aunt to my children, teach them how to play sports, never get to stand up with me or my sister at our weddings and never just be the awesome person she was when we were young is a hard thing to grasp. I pray that as I get older I can show people how amazing she was and I am thankful to know she is always with me in some way.
I am not afraid to talk about my sisters drug problem and her overdosing and dying. I find that talking about her makes her seem as if she is still here.
I have also gone to addiction awareness meetings, walks and events. I have spoken at these events to show people who might be dealing with my situation or Julia’s, that it is okay to ask for help. Which it is. If you think someone is having an addiction issue the best thing to do is to talk about it. Get help because sweeping it away just makes you bottle it up and cause many more emotional issues.
I usually remind myself that God never gives me more than I can handle and I know I can handle a lot. I feel like am the rock of my family.